For many people success is motivated by a variety of outcomes, ranging from love to anger, and every emotion in between. In my life the one that seems most successful is love. People will go to great lengths to be petty or out of anger, and theres no shortage of those types of stories online especially on Reddit. But to me I have found that love is the most powerful driver for its motivational power, and the outcome that is received.
Love is a powerful motivator. For parents it drives them to work harder and pursue promotions to deliver a better life for their children. For people in relationships, if one person is working hard to make income and another person is supporting them through the process, it is the desire to make someone else’s life better. In general the feeling of seeing someone working to help someone else is what makes it powerful because you want to “pay the effort” back. In a relationship you will often see this when one person is continuing to pursue higher education while the other person supports them.
So why, does this love seems so much more powerful than other emotions? When it comes to pettiness or anger, a lot of it can be attributed to social media of people sharing stories in much of the same way that positive stories are shared. While many enjoy their stories of exacting revenge or “just desserts” the reality is that most people aren’t as bad as people in these stories are. Success in these instances isn’t highly shared because theres not much to share or anything people would want to hear. In most successful relationships whether they are romantic or familial in the sense of building a family is a sense of belonging. We feel at peace with a partner or with your children whom you are building a family with. If we look back at times when you were younger you felt belonging with your friends, especially as a teenager where that belonging felt magnified. Now unlike the teenager with their friends, where love isn’t the driving factor. Feeling like you belong is a big part of love, which is why people get so distraught over the breaking of long term relationships. We all want to feel like we have a space to call our own, especially in relationships. Which in large part is why some people push themselves harder to bring more to add to that sense of belonging. We don’t need to have the best car or biggest house. But we do need transportation and shelter, however the basic needs we have often don’t meet what we want or aspire to have. And this is where the extra push and work comes in, to give someone else that thing. When one person is doing all of the extra pushing and work is when resentment is built, and the anger or pettiness we mentioned earlier. But when BOTH people are putting in the work needed, not out of greed but because of a genuine care and love is when the you can reach the greatest heights.